Go to TLC’s ‘Podcast’ page (links below) to get insights, proven strategies and practical tips to help you find, and land, a career that you love!

 🎙️ TLC for Working Mums Podcast  🎙️

🎧 Listen and subscribe to catch every episode:

• Apple Podcasts

• Spotify

Blog Post 29: The 3 things you need to create an amazing career change mindset

When people know they want to change careers, they are often not in the best headspace. They feel unfulfilled in their current career, and feel stressed and ‘busy’ whilst also feeling bored. 

When they think about what they want their next career move to be, more often than not it’s a list of what they don’t want (ie. A list of what they have in their current work and career that they don’t like or enjoy).

It can be quite tricky to be open-minded and explore all of the opportunities and possibilities out there when you are in a negative mindset.

Many clients come to me when they are deep in this mindset, and know they want to get out of it, but don’t know how.

So here are three strategies that can help shift you from a negative career change mindset to a more positive one, that will better serve you as you start exploring a career change.

1. Embrace a growth mindset

Dr Carol Dweck coined the terms fixed and growth mindsets. 

A fixed mindset is where one believes that their talents, abilities and skills are fixed and unchangeable. You’re either born with that skill or strength or you’re not. People with a fixed mindset find it diffciult to bounce back after perceived failures, and often take things personally. People with a fixed mindset may enjoy learning, but are truly afraid of not knowing something, of being ‘found out’. 

A growth mindset on the other hand is where one believes that their abilities, skills and talents can be developed. They don’t take ‘failures’ personally. They see failing at something as just learning that something didn’t work. They look at obstacles and see them as opportunities for growth.

I’m sure you can guess which mindset is crucial to have when changing careers.

If you approach your career change with a growth mindset, you will see that the challenges you face are opportunities for learning and development.

This is especially important if you are wanting to change careers to an industry or job function where you will need to learn and develop new skills. If you truly embrace the belief that your abilities can be cultivated and developed through determination, dedication and hard work, then you will look at your potential career change from a can-do, and even excited attitude and perspective, rather than it feeling daunting or overwhelming.

2. Clarify your P’s

When clients come to me seeking career clarity, and they want to discover what their professional purpose is, I work with them to create their Career Clarity Compass, which comprises the 5 P’s.

The 5 P’s are: personal values, priorities, prowess (skills and strengths), priorities and passions.

It is so important to reflect on and have a deep understanding of your 5 P’s when you are wanting to change careers, because those become the compass that guides your career change decisions.

It makes it so much easier to discover opportunities, evaluate potential career change options and keep you focused on a path that aligns who you are and what you want to achieve when you know what your 5 P’s are.

3. Reframe the term ‘failing’

Society has conditioned us to avoid failure at all costs. 

For me, even the thought of failing at something, anything, would make me sick.

I had to be good at everything. I couldn’t ‘fail’ at anything.

If I failed at something, it would mean I was a failure.

I’m sure many of you felt the same way I did.

As I delved deep into the world of personal development and discovered the world of coaching, one of the biggest epiphanies I had was around the concept of failure.

We are so afraid of failing, but what does it actually mean?

Failure is defined as “the omission of an expected action.”

So basically failure just means that you had expectations about something, and that it didn’t meet your expectations.

Failing is just a construct that you create in your mind.

Now I’m not saying don’t have any expectations of yourself, but I am saying that you get to choose what you define as failure, and then what you make it mean if you ‘fail’ at something.

For me, if I try something and it doesn’t work, it doesn’t mean I failed. I don’t make it mean I’m a failure. All I make it mean is that the thing I tried, that strategy, didn’t work.

If I fail at something, it just means I learnt something that didn’t work.

And it’s not a failure anyway, because it takes me one step closer to achieving my goal.

If you can shift your mindset and not make ‘failing’ mean something terrible about you, what would you do?

Where would you apply?

Who would you reach out to?

What would your next career move be?

See how many possibilities and opportunities are out there if you reframe what failing means?

You will become unstoppable.

If you want to create your unwavering, unstoppable and strong career change mindset, book in your free Mini Session and you will be amazed with how quickly you will create it.

Love Loren x

Blog Post 28: What type of career change do I want?

My clients come to me when they’re at a point in their life and career where they know they want to make a change, but are unsure of the type of change they want.

The truth is, there are many options on how to change it up in your career.

You can uplevel in your current career, you can make a career pivot or you can completely reinvent your career.

There is a difference between a career pivot and a career reinvention, and in today’s blog post I’m going to share with you the differences between the two and how you can best position yourself to make a career change.

A career reinvention is when you are changing both your job function and your industry.

A career pivot on the other hand is when you’re changing either your job function or your industry. For example, you move from a marketing role in FMCG (fast moving consumer goods - think supermarket goods) to a marketing role in the non-profit sector.

Many of my clients like the idea of doing a 2-step career change - they first make a career pivot out of either a job function or an industry and then do another pivot when they have more experience in that area.

When you are wanting to create a job search for a career pivot, it is important to reflect on your past experiences and what you want now. You need to ask yourself:

• What did/didn’t you like in previous roles?

• What are your motivational skills? These are the skills you’re good at AND enjoy doing

• What are your burnout skills? These are the skills you’re good at but that you don’t enjoy doing. You ideally want as little of these as possible in your next role.

From this, it is important to assess what your ultimate goal is. Is it to make a career pivot or a career reinvention?

This is important because then you can map your career change from A (where you are now) to B (where you want to be).

If you are unsure of where you want to be yet, that’s OK, but it is important to start getting clarity on where you ultimately want to get to in your career. 

There are MANY ways you can do this. Hiring a career coach can help you get crystal clear on a career goal, the roadmap to get there, who you should speak with and how to prepare for and land informational interviews (and the job ultimately), however if you want to try DIY first, ask yourself these important questions:

• If I could choose to do anything right now, what would it be?

• Who do I know that’s either in the industry or the job function I want to be in that I could talk to? And if you don’t think you know anyone, ask yourself, who are some people in your life that are ‘connectors’ that might know people in your desired job function or industry that you could ask for an intro?

• If I was already in the career I want to be in, what associations would I be a part of? What newsletters would I be subscribed to? What networking events would I go to? This insight will help you feel like more of an insider in a new industry or job function. And then, when you do reach out to people in that area, you’ll be able to show your knowledge and that you’re truly interested and passionate about that area.

Changing careers does not have to be such a daunting task. It can be really exciting and eye-opening if you let it.

You can also take small steps towards a career change rather than a giant leap. The options are endless.

If you want to start exploring the possibility of a career change, book in your free Career Strategy Session here.

Looking forward to creating the career and life you love with you!

Love Loren x

Blog Post 27: The 8 things you need to know about becoming an entrepreneur

I have been getting many clients lately that know they want to change careers, and then when we start coaching they realise that what they REALLY want is to start their own business.

This excites me SO much because us Mums really are incredible, and we have SO much to offer. 

Unfortunately though, because so many of us are people-pleasers and perfectionists, we hold ourselves back from our true potential and instead try to ‘fit’ ourselves into a box as an employee.

So when my clients decide that what they really want is to start their own business, I’m thrilled, and so I have started helping many with creating their businesses.

A lot of you have asked me how I’ve created a successful business in such a short amount of time, so I wanted to share 8 top tips that have helped me, my clients, and that might help you as well if you are considering starting a business of your own.

1. Knowing my purpose, my ‘why’

Having a compelling ‘why’, for why I wanted to start a business and who I want my business to serve is the driving force behind my goals.

I find it so incredibly easy to access that ‘why’ when I am coaching my incredible clients, however when I am doing all the other things that an entrepreneur needs to do to grow a thriving business, or when I am having an ‘off’ day, being able to go back to my why gives me the extra push and energy I need to continue going.

2. The ‘how to do it’ formula

The truth is, you won’t know ‘how’ to achieve your goal until you actually achieve it. So often we think (and plan) for it to be a step by step linear path, but it is never that in the end.

I learnt that ‘how to do’ something, anything, is really just a formula - you try something, it usually fails, you try something else, it might fail, then you try something else, and then it works. Then you go onto the next thing. Rinse and repeat.

Having a business is all about experimentation and trying new things.

Some people are afraid of this, and as a trained lawyer I was at first as well. However, when you are not following someone else's roadmap, you need to try new things (and likely fail) and try again.

I don’t really call it failing anymore. I call it ‘learning something that didn’t work.’

It’s so easy to personalise when you try something that didn’t work. Instead of thinking ‘this strategy didn’t work’ people think ‘I don’t work, I’m no good at this.’

That’s why in the back of my head I’m always thinking, “separate the data from the drama.”

In other words, take your ego out of it. It’s not about you!

What didn’t work? Ok, that thing I tried didn’t work. I’ll try something else.

3. You only fail if you quit

As I mentioned above, failing is part of the process. Trying things that may not work. People personalise these ‘fails’ and beat themselves up because they make it mean something terrible about them. 

But trying things that may not work is part of the process. 

Success really is built on a pile of failures.

The difference between people that succeed and those who quit is that people that succeed have more ‘fails’, and continue moving forward and having even more fails.

People who quit actually fail ahead of time.

Quitting won’t get you to your goals any faster.

4. Self-doubt will always be there

One of the most incredible epiphanies I had this year happened when I was listening to a very successful entrepreneur’s podcast and she was saying that she felt so much self-doubt when she launched one of her very well-known programs this year.

I thought to myself ‘how can she have self-doubt’? She’s the queen in this space, and she’s done this so many times before!

But then I realised that self-doubt will always be there. As you start climbing the ‘success’ ladder in your business or in your career, self-doubt will always come along for the ride.

And I’ve learnt to reframe self-doubt as a good thing.

If self-doubt is present, it means that I’m expanding myself, I’m stepping out of my comfort zone. 

If you think about it, self-doubt doesn’t mean anything has gone wrong. It’s just your brain trying to alert you that this is new territory.

But all of life’s brilliance happens when you step into new territory.

I now see self-doubt as a companion along this ride of life.

I love the analogy of me driving a car. Self-doubt is in the backseat of the car. I acknowledge it’s there and continue driving. If I let it take the wheel we would definitely stop, and then I wouldn’t achieve my goals or true potential.

5. Post content - just show up 

I really didn’t want to be on socials before I started my business. We had struggled with infertility and I vividly remember that when we were going through fertility treatment before we had our first miracle baby Chloe all I would see on socials were people’s pregnancy announcements and baby photos. I found it so painful that I stopped going on social media. 

Fast forward a few years and I knew I wanted to start my own business. I didn’t even have an Instagram account. 

I reluctantly signed up to it, scrolled through my feed and really didn’t want to be on there.

But I knew that I needed to start sharing my content on there.

I had so much content to share, to offer and I knew it could help so many people.

So I decided to ‘get over myself’ and just do it. Just start posting.

Everyone starts with 0 followers. And I started with 0 followers.

So I started posting, consistently. I remember the first time I created a reel. I was literally shaking before I pressed ‘play’. 

But I did it. I created my first reel. And since then I’ve been posting and creating reels everyday since.

Often I’ll get a couple of likes and shares on my posts, thinking that only a handful of people have seen it.

But then I’ll be at my kids preschool, or at a kids birthday party, or at the shops, or at a playground, and someone will stop me and tell me how much they love what I’ve been posting. How much they love reading my blog each week. How deeply I’ve resonated with them. 

I also get DMs from people I’ve never met before, telling me how much they love my content and how much I’m helping them.

Even though I’m not getting hundreds of ‘likes’, I know my content is valuable and is helping so many Mums. 

I don’t need the vanity metrics of ‘likes’ on my posts or reels. I have the real data - and that’s from the Mums I’m helping.

And so I show up and post consistently. 

6. Coaches need coaching too

Even though I am a certified coach and my mindset has become my greatest asset for creating happiness and success in my business and my life, I still have niggling thoughts and beliefs that I want to work on. 

Having my own coach has helped me so much in nipping those thoughts and limiting beliefs in the bud so that I can move forward and achieve my goals and work towards my true potential.

Having a coach doesn’t mean you need to be ‘fixed’. Coaches are for people that are functioning but want to uplevel their lives. They know they have the potential inside them to do something more in their lives, to reach that next level, and so they hire a coach to help them get to that next level, to help them achieve their goals, to reach their full potential.

7. My question of the year

When I’m doing something that is either not my favourite thing to do, I’ve never done it before, or it seems quite complex, the first thing I ask myself is this: ‘How can I make this fun and easy?’

This question is one of my favourite questions to ask myself because it gets me out of overanalysis and perfectionism and my brain loves answering this question.

Often, the answer to this question is the next step forward that is super simple, and it helps me get unstuck.

8. Mindset is everything

I’ve alluded to this throughout this blog post, but mindset really is everything.

The way we see reality is our reality.

It’s not even about having a positive mindset all the time. It’s about knowing how to manage your mindset.

Knowing how my mind works and operates, and how to shift my mindset at any given time to work for me rather than against me has honestly changed my life. 

My business has grown exponentially. My relationship with my husband is the best it’s ever been. I’m a better Mum to my kids.

Your mind controls everything, so it is crucial to know how to control it effectively.

The best news is that it is a skill that you can learn.

It is a skill that I learned.

I did NOT have this skill when I was younger. My mindset controlled me, that’s for sure.

This is where having a Certified Coach in your corner is so essential.

Your greatest asset is your mind. Your mind is an appreciating asset, so it is imperative for you to invest in it. For you to learn the skill of managing your mindset.

If you want to know more about mindset and how you can learn to manage your own mindset, please DM me and let me help you. 

This is what I help clients with every single day. It is what transformed my career and my life. 

Love Loren x

Blog Post 26: How to network when you *hate* networking

People hate the term networking.

I used to be one of them.

Many people don't know this, but when I was studying Law at University I applied for clerkships (which are essentially paid 3 month internships at top and mid-tier law firms) for two years. These are coveted positions - very high in demand, and most law students try to secure a coveted clerkship position, because the majority of clerks then receive graduate offers at the law firms. In short, it was a BIG deal to get one. For me, it felt like the be-all end-all. If I didn’t get one, I would surely die of embarrassment. Of failure.

And guess what? The first year I applied, I received two interviews from mid-tier firms and NO offers.

I felt like a complete failure.

After several months of beating myself up, I decided that if I want to try again to get a clerkship the following year, I would need a different strategy.

I had the marks at University. But there was something missing. I didn’t know anyone in any of the law firms. I was the first person in my family to study law (and study at university in Australia). Our family didn’t have a big network.

But I realised that I needed to build a network.

I started reaching out to people. 

At first, to dip my toes in the networking pool, I reached out to people in law firms that were a year or two ahead of me, and then I connected with people that were a few more years ahead of that. 

I built meaningful connections with those people. I was interested in them, their career trajectories, their challenges. I offered to help where I could.

And guess what? The following year I received offers at two top-tier law firms.

If it wasn’t for me networking, I doubt I would’ve had any offers.

Networking isn’t a way to find a job, it’s THE way to find a job.

Over the years, I’ve successfully changed careers, worked internationally and had incredible work experiences and opportunities because of networking.

I have built a large extensive network spanning multiple industries and countries that I share with my clients, that has served me immeasurably. And it is SO much easier to build than you think.

Here are 9 strategies for networking effectively and efficiently.

1. Reframe how you view networking

Let's start by reframing the way you view networking. Instead of picturing awkward cocktail parties or forced conversations, think of networking as developing meaningful connections with others. Every interaction, whether online or in-person, is an opportunity to connect with others authentically. It’s nothing more than a conversation between two people, something you’ve done many times before. 

And if that still feels overwhelming, you can also think of networking as a research skill. You are just learning, gathering information - what can you learn about a job, an industry, a company, a person, and what can you share to help others.

You can also reframe networking by adjusting your expectations. The goal is not to get a job or ask for a job (at first anyway), the goal is to grow your network and meet people in your desired industry, job and/or company.

You want to build meaningful connectiions that can become powerful professional relationships, and to do this you want to start by getting to know the person, their career trajectory, what motivates them and how you can help them.

Also, many Introverts often excel in active listening, a valuable skill in networking, and this is a beautiful skill to have because people LOVE talking about themselves!

Instead of focusing on what you'll say next, concentrate on truly understanding the other person. This not only helps build stronger connections but also takes the pressure off you to constantly come up with things to say.

2. Understand that networking isn’t a way to get a job, it’s the way to get a job

Did you know that 75% of jobs are not openly advertised? Meaning they are not on job boards, or even on most company websites.

So where are they? 

They are in the ‘hidden’ market.

This sounds very secretive, but really all it means is that 75% of jobs are filled through referrals (ie. networking).

Jobs and opportunities are connected with people. So having people learn your name and what you’re about is the best way to connect with all of the opportunities out there.

The more relationships you develop, the wider your network will become and the more opportunities you'll be able to discover and decide between.

This is why it is so important to network.

3. Be strategic 

Identify your desired industry, job function or companies and reach out to people - be strategic with who you are reaching out to BUT also make sure you reach out to several people (at least 10), not just one or two. At this stage, don’t put all of your eggs in one basket.

Some people don’t reply, it has NOTHING to do with you. It’s 100% to do with them. They might be busy, they might not even check their LinkedIn. Just don’t take it personally. 

4. Leverage online platforms - LinkedIn

If face-to-face networking events make you cringe, consider dipping your toe in making meaningful connections using online platforms such as LinkedIn. 

It has never been so easy to connect with someone as it is today.

But if you do this, always take it one step further. You want to develop meaningful connections after all.

Send someone an invitation to connect (pro tip: ALWAYS with a personalised message) and start a conversation.

5. Set realistic goals - Gradual expansion 

It's best to start that process of discovering what’s next, explore the market and start cultivating strategic professional relationships as early as possible. The more relationships you develop, the wider your network will become and the more opportunities you’ll be able to discover and decide between.

Set small, achievable networking goals to make the process feel less overwhelming. Depending on your networking goals and your timeline for changing careers or getting a new job, you could start by reaching out to 2-3 new people per week, and perhaps arrange a call or coffee catch-up with one of them. 

Then you can gradually increase your goals as you become more comfortable.

6. Seek coaching and mentorship - guidance in networking (and work with someone that is connected!)

Find a coach and mentor who can guide you through the networking process. They can provide insights, share their experiences, and even introduce you to their network. Having someone to lean on can make networking a lot less daunting and a lot more fun.

7. Embrace rejection - it’s part of the process

Not every interaction will lead to a meaningful connection, and that's okay. Accept that rejection is a natural part of networking. Learn from each experience, and don't let setbacks deter you from future opportunities. Again, don’t take it personally. 

I EXPECT to be rejected when I’m networking, and that way when it happens I’m not surprised, I just accept it and move on. 

Don’t make a perceived rejection mean something negative about you. Don’t make it affect your self-worth or self-confidence (this is what I often see with my clients). Remember, you can choose how to react someone not replying to your LinkedIn message - why choose to react by making it mean you mustn’t be worthy? Rather, you can make it mean that they are busy, that person isn’t the right one to connect with, and move on.

If you make a perceived rejection mean that something must be wrong with you, you’ll sit in that negative space and it’ll be a lot harder to continue networking effectively. 

I hear so many people saying that they tried networking, then someone didn’t respond, and so they stopped networking. They were too afraid to continue networking as they feared being rejected again, so they ended up rejecting themselves ahead of time.

8. Know your UVP

For all you amazing people out there that love to plan, and you might also be struggling with self-confidence,

This is one of the most important strategies for networking effectively, because it not only helps you prepare but it is also will give you a massive boost of self-confidence.

It’s so important to know what your Unique Value Proposition is.

Know what you have to offer. Understand your transferable skills and how they apply to your desired industry or role, but also think about all of your innate strengths, your values, your personal experiences that make you unique and differentiate you from others. 

Writing all of this down keeps it front of mind during networking conversations, which helps with your self-confidence because you know that you also provide value to this relationship, and it also helps you think about how you can add value to them.

Networking is a two way street, it’s a mutually beneficial relationship. 

A Coach can also help you identify all of the skills and unique talents that you have to offer, and help package it and articulate it to your new connections.

9. Create your networking style - authenticity wins every time

Don't force yourself into a networking mould that doesn't suit you. Instead, create your unique networking style. Whether it's face-to-face coffee meetings, or virtual, find approaches that align with your personality and preferences.

Ultimately, networking doesn't have to be a painful experience. By reframing your perspective, leveraging online platforms, setting realistic goals, and embracing your strengths, you can build a powerful network without the anxiety. 

Remember, networking is about building authentic relationships, and there's no one-size-fits-all approach. Find what works for you, stay true to yourself, and notice how quickly you’re able to build meaningful connections with others.

If you have any questions or need personalised advice on navigating your career, feel free to reach out.

Happy networking!

Blog Post 25: PSA: Job sites are NOT your friend if you’re wanting to a new job. Here’s why (and what to do instead) ➡️

You’ve been feeling it for a while.

Or rather, not ‘feeling it’… 

While perhaps you enjoyed your job when you first started, it’s no longer exciting to you. You’re not fulfilled. You’re a combination of bored and stressed (a terrible combination of feelings).

So you start thinking about what else you can do.

And where do you look? The job sites.

You search the job sites, set up an alert for roles that you think might be a better fit.

You apply for a few, not really that excited about any of them, but thinking that it’s a good next step.

You spend time and effort writing your application. You spend days fixing up your resume.

You hit ‘submit’ and wait for a response.

And wait.

Crickets.

After a few days, you receive an email notifying you that your application has been unsuccessful.

Or you are ghosted and you receive nothing.

You think that you mustn’t be ‘good enough’ for that role. Your application wasn’t good enough. 

You’ll never be good enough to do anything else.

You feel defeated and unworthy.

Sound familiar?

I speak to SO many people that tell me a similar story, so I wanted to share with you some VERY useful advice and insights about job sites and job searches, that I’m sure will help you if you are wanting to change jobs or careers.

If you’re using job boards as your main source of inspiration for trying to discover what roles might be a better fit for you and if you’re predominantly using job boards for your job search PLEASE read this!

Using job sites as your main job search strategy is NOT a good idea.

I repeat, do NOT use job sites as your main job search strategy.

Here are a few reasons why:

1. Job sites are a PASSIVE job search technique

A strategic job search plan includes BOTH active and passive job search techniques, and job sites are a very passive job search technique.

Passive techniques include searching and applying on job sites or employer website postings and aimlessly connecting with people on LinkedIn (without a targeted strategy or personalised message). They are passive in the sense that they don’t create any meaningful connection with a person. And opportunities are attached to people.

You are just a nameless, faceless data sheet.

Active techniques however include face to face networking, targeted informational interviews, career fairs, networking events, targeted LinkedIn connections and specific asks.

2. 75% of jobs are NOT posted on job site

Less than 25% of jobs are posted on job sites(!) meaning that you’re fighting for a measly 25% of the jobs with the rest of the world who doesn't know this.

So where are the remaining 75% of jobs? They are in the ‘hidden market’.

This sounds very secretive but it just means that 75% of positions are not advertised in traditional print or online sources. 

75% of jobs are filled through referrals, through networks.

This is why networking is a MUCH more effective and active job search strategy.

3. It is more likely that the Applicant Tracking System, and not a human, will be seeing your application

When you are submitting an application via a job site, it is going directly into computer software known as an Applicant Tracking System (ATS).

Hiring managers and recruiters simply don’t have the time or resources to look at the hundreds of resumes they receive for each job post, so they use ATS, which analyses your resume and stores it in a database. 

Hiring managers then search the ATS database for resumes that match the qualifications they’re looking for.

This is great for employers, but hard on job seekers because up to 75% of resumes from qualified applicants never make it out of the ATS database into human hands. 

4. Need to have at least 95% of the qualifications 

If you don’t have over 95% of qualifications on your resume for a particular job and just apply via a job site (where your resume is analysed by ATS), you have less than a 2% chance of getting the job.

I don’t know about you but I do NOT like those odds.

5. It’s a waste of your precious time 

Submitting your resume to 100 jobs does not increase your chances of getting an interview or a job. 

It’s not about quantity. It’s about quality. And using your time wisely.

So here’s what you need to do instead:

1. Use job boards as a starting off point

Use job boards for inspiration. Search for roles that you might be interested in to understand what the roles and responsibilities might be if you were to work in that role. Have a look at the qualifications and training that the role usually requires.

Also, when you are creating job applications, have a look at job descriptions for similar roles on job sites, identify core competencies, roles and responsibilities and use those industry and role-specific keywords in your customised resume and cover letter.

2. Set up alerts on a max of 2 job sites

I recommend that my clients only look at 2 job sites and set up alerts for a max of 2 sites, otherwise it can get quite overwhelming and you’ll receive a lot of repeated job alerts.

3. ALWAYS do a +1 approach

If you are going to spend the time and effort creating a job application for a job posting on a site, make sure you ALWAYS do a +1 approach.

A +1 approach means that you do the thing (eg. submit your job application) and then you take it one step further by reaching out DIRECTLY to the hiring manager or recruiter to introduce yourself, and put your application in their email inbox or hands.

Add them on LinkedIn, always with a personalised message.

I have MANY more proven strategies and practical tips to share on this, so be sure to read my next blog post which will be on how to network when you HATE networking!

Love Loren x

Blog Post 24: the REAL reason you’re not making a career change…

“I’m so afraid to make a career change,” my amazing client Alicia said to me.

“What are you afraid of?” I asked, already knowing her answer.

“I’m afraid of failing.”

This is the main reason I hear why someone isn’t making a career change.

They feel unhappy and unfulfilled in their current job, but they are too afraid to leave their current job and career, for they fear they might ‘fail’ if they try something else.

A recent study found that over 70% of the workforce are unhappy in their careers and are actively looking for another job.

This doesn’t mean that they will move to another job, but they are looking for one. I’m sure for many of them, this means looking occasionally on job boards (which is NOT an effective job search strategy, and if you are doing this please stop and reach out to learn what an effective job search entails!)

Many of them will end up ‘settling’ and they will perhaps change companies, within the same industry, or change job titles. They think that the grass will be greener on the other side. But if they are not happy in their job they are currently in, chances are they will not be happy in the same job in a different company. Same level different devil.

I believe at least 70% of the workforce want to make a proper career change. They want to move industry, move job function. They want to do something completely different because they know in their bones that what they are doing right now does not light them up, is not purposeful work for them.

Many of my Mum clients come to me when they know they need to make a career change, but they have no idea where to begin.

The biggest work we need to do though is, not necessarily discovering their true career calling, because that will happen, it’s more about delving into how they define failure. And more importantly, what they make failure mean about themselves.

I have learnt over the years as a certified Career and Confidence Coach and entrepreneur, that we as humans, and particularly Mums, see failure as something that is terrible. 

We have been conditioned to literally fear failure. 

And if we do ‘fail’, we make it mean something terrible about ourselves as a person. 

So I wanted to talk about failure in today’s podcast. How it’s defined, what we make it mean about ourselves, and then look at how we can reframe what we make failure mean so that we can let go of the invisible prism that we create that holds us back from going out there and achieving what our heart truly desires.

The definition of failure is “the omission of an expected or required action”.

So, if failure just means we or someone else didn’t meet our expectations, why do we make it such a big deal?

Something just didn’t turn out the way we expected.

Failure is literally a construct that we create in our minds. 

If failing means that we don’t meet our own expectations, well, we can then define what our expectations are. 

You can create your own definition of what failure is.

So why not create a different definition of failure for yourself?

Despite this logic, I know that when we perceive we have failed at something, we make it mean something terrible about ourselves as a person. We don’t naturally think “oh, that strategy we tried didn’t work” we think “we don’t work”. 

A client gets an interview, and then doesn’t get the job, and she will make it mean that she’s really bad at interviews, rather than making it mean that the job wasn’t right for her.

So what can we do about this?

It’s time to reframe failure.

It’s time to see failure as a GOOD thing.

When I learnt how to reframe failure, my business and life exploded in the best way possible. I felt happier, lighter, and have been able to achieve amazing results in my business and my life.

Instead of making failure mean something bad about myself as a person, I choose to make failure mean that I’m courageous. I was afraid to do something and I did it anyway.

And maybe I didn't meet my own expectations of how it would go, but so what?

Instead of focusing on me failing and me being a terrible person for having failed at that thing, I think to myself “ok so that strategy didn’t work”, what can I learn from this fail?

You learn more from your failures than from your successes. 

And success is built on a pile of failures.

I listen to and follow a few very successful people. And each one of them have failed many MANY times, before they got to where they are now. What we see and think is that they were an overnight success, but in truth, they have 5 failed businesses, thousands of failed strategies beneath that success. 

So instead of seeing myself as ‘failing’ at something, I see it as learning what didn’t work and moving forward.

What I find helpful, and my clients find helpful, is separating the data from the drama.

So if you're going for a job interview and you don't get the job, you can make it mean that you're not qualified enough. not good enough, too old to change careers etc OR you can make it mean that the job was not the right job for you. Not every job will be right for you. And what did you learn from the experience? What did you learn about yourself, about the industry, about the role, about the interviewers? What did you learn about interviews? How can you further develop your interview skills for the next interview? 

One of my coaches taught me something that really resonated. There’s a very scientific method of achieving success. It is: try something, fail, learn. Try something else, fail, learn. Try something else, succeed. Then onto the next step. Rinse and repeat.

The other reason why I believe we are so afraid of failing is, not only what we make it mean about ourselves as a person, but also what we do to ourselves when we perceive to have failed at something.

We beat ourselves up.

Now this just compounds our negative thinking about ourselves and our abilities. 

No wonder we are petrified of failing. Of not meeting our own expectations.

So to counteract this, I come up with what I call a ‘failure plan’. 

I promise to have my own back.

If I am doing something new and feel afraid that I might fail, I promise myself that I’ll have my own back if I don’t meet my own expectations. I’ll have my own back and be proud of myself for stepping outside my comfort zone. I will love myself more and not less for doing something that challenged me. I will honour myself and my past self for setting that goal and expectation. And I know I would’ve learnt so much more going for that thing and failing than I would if I had done nothing and stayed stuck.

You can choose to learn something from a perceived fail or you can choose to beat yourself up over it. Why would you choose the latter? There is no upside to that.

So many of my clients say they identify themselves as high-achievers with high-standards, and trust me, I am also in that camp. But that doesn’t mean that failure means something that’s more catastrophic to you. You can CHOOSE what to make it mean.

Not going for something, not making a career change is when you REALLY fail. You are literally failing ahead of time.

Letting one (or many) fails along the way to your goal mean that you’ve failed at achieving your goal, and then quitting is also failing.

Quitting won’t get you there any faster.

So, for all my amazing Mum out there that are on the fence as to whether they want to make a career change, and the real reason behind them being on the fence is because they are afraid of failing, I encourage you to ask yourself: 

• How do you define ‘failure’?

• Why are you afraid of failing?

• What do you make failure mean about yourself?

And then, given everything I’ve said in this blog about failure, create your new career change goal AND your own Failure Plan.

• What do you really want to do? Discover what you want your career change to be (and I’m here to help you discover that with my 4 step framework that takes the guesswork out of your career change!)

• What would you be doing if you weren’t afraid?

• And if you do ‘fail’ along the way to achieving your goal, what can you make it mean that’ll serve you in moving forward?

• What can you learn from a failure along the way to your career change?

Remember, YOU have the power to make failure mean whatever you want about yourself. You can choose make it mean something terrible about yourself as a person or you can just make it mean that the strategy that you tried didn't work. Which one feels better to you?

You can choose to beat yourself up for not meeting your own expectations, or you can choose to have your own back.

So which one do you choose?

Love Loren x

Blog Post 23: It’s time to ditch the cape: 8 strategies to BREAK FREE from Superwoman Syndrome 🦸‍♀️

Mums are superheroes, there’s no doubt about it.

Creating and developing tiny humans is nothing short of miraculous, but everyday Mums are wearing so many different hats. Mum, Spouse, Daughter, Friend, Teacher, Cook, Cleaner, Shopper, Uber driver, Worker… and that’s just to name a few.

It is no wonder that we try to uphold the image of being Superwoman. 

We are doing so many things and are in a million different places at the same time (at least in our heads). 

While we are getting the kids ready for the day we are thinking about that email we need to send to a client.

While we are driving the kids to school we are thinking about what we are going to make for dinner tonight. 

The constant mental load is never-ending. So too is our ever-growing to-do list. 

We inevitably become women that feel the need to uphold the Superwoman precedent that we have set for ourselves. Saying ‘yes’ to things that we don’t really want to do, setting unrealistic goals and expectations on ourselves and putting pressure on ourselves to get more done in the day than there are hours. 

No wonder we are SO exhausted by the end of the day!

Superwoman Syndrome refers to the pressure women often feel to excel in multiple roles simultaneously, such as being a successful professional, a caring partner, a devoted parent, a reliable friend, and more, often at the expense of their well-being. 

It is deeply rooted in perfectionism and people-pleasing.

But as I always say to my clients, more often than not when we are people pleasing, we are not pleasing ourselves. When we say yes to others, we are saying no to ourselves.

I’ve coached many Mums, and they all present with some form of Superwoman Syndrome. Unfortunately, whilst we think being Superheroes is the way to get it all done, we also place so much unnecessary pressure on ourselves that we do all of the things from a place of scarcity, lack, hurried hustle energy. We are in a state of constant overwhelm.

I’ve noticed that by implementing a few strategies in my life I’ve been able to overcome Superwoman Syndrome, so I wanted to share these with you all.

1. Set REALISTIC expectations of and for yourself

We are human, not superheroes! Understand and accept that it's okay not to excel in every role all the time. 

If you know realistically that you won’t be able to get everything done on your to-do list today, and know that you’ll look back at it at the end of the day and think of yourself as a failure or lazy for not getting everything done, you need to change up how you organise and prioritise (and how you talk to yourself!).

For me, I have a process where I schedule in everything I need to do for the week: work-related, mum-related and life-related and put everything in my calendar at the start of each week. This way, I can just open my calendar each day and see what needs to be done, and there is already time allotted to that task. This process has changed my life and has made me incredibly productive, a lot less stressed and a lot more relaxed. Because I know there is time to do what I have planned to do, and so then when I have my scheduled family time and self-care time (which I put on FIRST by the way), I can really relax into those things, knowing that all of the life admin and work tasks will be done during their allotted times. 

Due to my success using this process, I created a framework called Planning Power Hour that I share with my clients, and it has changed their lives as well.

2. Prioritise properly

Learning how to prioritise is perhaps one of the most underrated skills we can learn. It is essential to feel balanced and confident.

If you know how to properly prioritise you will feel like what you are doing is aligned with what is most important to you. This will help you feel a lot of self-confidence as you move through life.

Not knowing how to prioritise means that you are living reactively and constantly ‘putting out fires’. You are doing things that you deem ‘urgent’ rather than doing things that are truly important.

It is important to evaluate your priorities and also reevaluate them to make adjustments as needed. It's normal for priorities to change over time, and it's essential to align your actions with what truly matters to you.

During my Planning Power Hour, when I am looking at my task list and putting everything in my calendar, I ask myself the following questions to help me prioritise effectively:

1. What actions will move the needle the most for my business this week?

1. Bonus question - to ‘sense-check’ whether my perfectionism is coming to the surface, I also ask myself regarding work tasks ‘what if everything is fine and perfect as-it is?’ (For example, maybe I don’t need to spend another hour updating the wording on my website!)

2. What do I need to get done this week for the household?

3. What can I defer to a later week?

4. What can I delegate to others?

5. What can I delete altogether from my to-do list?

3. Learn to say no

This might just be one of the hardest things to do.

Learning to say no to additional responsibilities or to tasks that aren't crucial is essential for preventing burnout. This is why evaluating and re-evaluating your priorities is so important.

When you say ‘yes’ to something, you are saying ‘no’ to something else. Remember that.

4. Ask for help

Accept that you cannot do everything on your own. Start internalising the thought that ‘It takes a village’ because it does!

Delegate tasks at work and at home whenever possible. 

I used to be so afraid to ask for help because I made it mean that I wasn’t capable of doing something. However, I then started shifting that unhelpful thought to make it mean that I could do that thing if I wanted to, but I know that it would mean I would struggle to get something else done. So if it is possible to get help with that thing, then take advantage of it.

I’m very fortunate that both my parents and in-laws help me out with the kids. But I could very easily be so wrapped up in my Superwoman Syndrome that I don’t ask for that help. 

The truth is, people do like helping other people, particularly people that they love.

I’ve started thinking thoughts that make ‘asking for help’ mean something that is positive, that serves me and others.

My parents and in-laws have told me how much they love spending time with my children, so now when I ask if they can please help out, I know that for them it’s something that is enjoyable as well.

I also think back to my childhood when I had no grandparents living in the same country as me, and I really missed out on that special relationship and experience with my grandparents, so I know for my parents and in-laws, and for my children, that bonding with each other and spending time together is a beautiful thing.

If you don’t have parents or in-laws around, you can also ask your spouse, friends and even hired help to share the responsibilities and lighten the load. 

The first step in overcoming Superwoman Syndrome however is to make the ask!

5. Practice self-care

I know, easier said than done. But is it?

For me, I choose to wake up before my kids and husband so I can exercise, otherwise I know it’ll be a lot harder to do during the day. 

Exercise for me is part of my self-care. It helps me relax, quieten my mind and after listening to my music (and not the Wiggles) for 30 minutes I feel like I’ve already done something for myself each day. 

I believe that doing these things for myself actually helps me be a better, more relaxed and happier Mum and person to be around, ready to take on the day after I’ve had a few minutes of my own ‘me’ time. 

6. Challenge perfectionism

Again, this is a practice I have to do daily.

I challenge my own perfectionistic tendencies and remember that perfection is unattainable and can be detrimental to my well-being. 

When I can feel perfectionism or ‘not enoughness’ creeping into my mind, I say out loud, ‘I am doing my best.’ This helps quieten my perfectionism. 

Another great thought is ‘You don’t have to be better than you are.’

I also try to celebrate my achievements, no matter how small they seem. Such as completing and publishing a blog post!

7. Seek professional help to support you

If you find yourself struggling to manage stress, anxiety, or feelings of overwhelm, don't hesitate to seek professional help. Speaking to a coach or therapist can provide valuable insights and coping strategies. Hiring a coach changed my life, and helped me overcome my own Superwoman Syndrome.

8. Support and empower others

Another way to overcome Superhero Syndrome is to be part of the conversation about overcoming it and not be ‘martyrs’, dying quietly for the cause.

I want to show up in a way that demonstrates to my daughter and the generations to come that we don’t have to do everything and prioritise everyone over ourselves and be people-pleasers to feel approval and feel ‘worthy’. We are 100% worthy no matter what.

Overcoming Superwoman Syndrome is about embracing your humanity, setting healthy boundaries, and prioritising our self-care. 

Remember that it's OK to ask for help and that your well-being is essential for you being effective in your many roles in life.

I’ve decided to hang up my Superwoman cape, whilst still being the best person I can be, and I hope you will as well!

Let me know which of these strategies you will use to cultivate a balanced and fulfilling life.

You are amazing and worthy, just as you are.

Love Loren x

Blog Post 22: What discomfort are you choosing? 🤔

My body was shaking and my hands were sweaty as I pressed the record icon on GarageBand. My voice cracked as I spoke into my podcast microphone for the very first time. 

“Hhhi, my name is Loren and welcome to the Career and Confidence Podcast for Mums.”

I felt SO nervous talking into that mic. I felt so uncomfortable. I wasn’t even talking to anyone yet! The podcast hasn’t even been published yet. But the thought of people listening to it, the thought of me putting my ideas out there and deciding to create a podcast filled me with such nervousness and trepidation.

I felt SO much discomfort. But I knew it was the good kind of discomfort.

Let me explain.

There are two types of discomfort. There is a good type of discomfort and a bad type of discomfort.

The BAD type of discomfort is the one where you stay stuck, where you stay in unfulfilling work, where you don't explore what could be possible for you.

The GOOD type of discomfort is the one where you step outside of your comfort zone, where you're taking massive action and going for what you really want in life.

All my clients come to me because they are feeling some kind of discomfort. 

Usually, it's the discomfort of knowing deep down inside that there is something else ‘out there’ for them, but they don’t know what it could be. They fear the unknown, they fear truly exploring what it could be, so they stay stuck.

There they feel the discomfort of staying the same. 

They feel the discomfort of staying in an unfulfilling career doing unfulfilling work.

That discomfort eats at them. It permeates other areas of their life, like how they show up to their partner, work colleagues, friends and kids. 

That’s the bad type of discomfort.

The brave ones come to me to help get them out of that discomfort.

The interesting thing though is that when you step out of the bad type of discomfort, you enter a new kind of discomfort. The good type of discomfort.

My clients don’t love this at first.  

Naturally, they are humans. Neither did I when I first realised this truth.

BUT ask yourself - is the goal of life to feel ‘comfortable’ all of the time?

If we were ‘comfortable’ all the time we arguably wouldn't be doing much, we would just be sitting on our couch all day. Where’s the growth and learning in that?

There’s no growth in comfort.

There’s no upleveling your career and your life in comfort. 

The good type of discomfort is the discomfort that expands you as a human, that evolves you into the next best version of yourself. 

The good type of discomfort allows you to step out of your comfort zone and see what’s possible for you.

It’s the discomfort of discovering who you truly are, what you genuinely want, and then exploring the possibilities and opportunities out there to create a fulfilling career.

This good type of discomfort IS the currency you pay to achieve your dreams.

As humans, I believe we are ALWAYS going to feel some kind of discomfort.

But society and our culture has made it so easy to escape this good kind of discomfort.

We are encouraged to escape discomfort.

If you’re working on something difficult, how tempting is it to just scroll through social media, go get a snack, go watch Netflix?

There are so many escapes these days. There are so many ways to distract yourself and not feel that discomfort.

But that discomfort is growth.

That discomfort is the valley you have to go through to achieve your goals, the path to success. 

You can't be comfortable all the way to success.

So ask yourself: What type of discomfort are you choosing right now?

If you notice you’re in the bad type of discomfort and want to step into the good type of discomfort, what do you need to do to get there?

What do you need to tell yourself to get there?

If you want help stepping into the good type of discomfort, with a framework and roadmap to get you to where you KNOW you’re supposed to be, I encourage you to book in your free Strategy Session and learn how to LOVE that good type of discomfort. 

Because that good type of discomfort IS the pathway to your dreams. It’s how you create the career and life you’ve always wanted.

Love Loren x

Blog Post 21: How to Navigate Career Transitions Without the 'Compare and Despair' Trap

In the midst of a coaching session, I found myself across from one of my amazing Mum client’s, Emily, a skilled lawyer eager for a career shift. Her passion for the startup world was palpable. As we delved into her aspirations, it was clear: she sought a new avenue for her organisational prowess and project management skills in the dynamic startup landscape.

Emily's vision was clear—she aimed to leverage her legal acumen into an operations role within a startup. Yet, despite her fervour, as we began drafting her targeted job search strategy, a hurdle arose. Each time she identified a key contact, a hesitation lingered. The barrier? Comparison.

Like many incredible individuals navigating career transitions, Emily found herself measuring her aspirations against the achievements and experiences of others. The more she looked at potential connections in her desired field, the more she doubted her worthiness. This comparison trap held her back from taking that crucial leap, fearing she might not measure up or be seen as a credible contender.

This pattern is all too common. Clients are brimming with excitement when they gain career clarity about their newfound career path, only to lose steam when they start sizing themselves up against individuals already established in their dream roles. This 'compare and despair' phenomenon can shatter one's confidence and hinder progress.

In coaching, I often emphasise a crucial shift in perspective. Rather than viewing these accomplished individuals as unattainable benchmarks, they should be seen as inspirations, guiding lights showcasing what's possible. These pioneers walked a path that others aspire to tread—how fortunate to have a blueprint to navigate a similar journey?

Comparing your Chapter 1 to someone else's Chapter 10 is a recipe for self-doubt, critical self-talk, overwhelm and staying stuck. 

Instead, recognising your own unique skills, experiences, and the value you can offer paves the way forward. 

Embracing diverse experiences—like my journey through law, public relations, and executive recruitment—illustrates the rich tapestry of skills one accumulates, enriching your potential contributions to any new industry or role.

My own evolution from law to entrepreneurship, honed in the whirlwind of New York's executive recruitment scene, wasn't a linear trajectory. It taught me invaluable skills, connecting dots that eventually led me to success in the legal arena and then again as an entrepreneur and coach.

The key? It's not about comparing; it's about learning, evolving, and embracing the diverse chapters that culminate in your unique professional narrative.

Emily, like so many clients, discovered that her worth and potential weren’t tethered to the experiences of others. Recognising her value and unique journey, she approached her job search strategy with newfound confidence. She saw herself not as an imposter, but as a skilled professional ready to carve her distinct path in the startup world.

The lesson is simple: Embrace your journey. Don't ‘compare and despair’ and let others' successes stifle your growth. That is fixed mindset thinking and not growth mindset and abundance thinking. 

Your story, with all its chapters, is what makes you an asset, it’s what makes you uniquely positioned to provide the value only you can provide. So rather than looking at another person and comparing yourself to them, look at the other person and feel inspired by them. 

From that feeling of inspiration it will be a whole lot easier to think about all of the ways you add value to your newfound career path, and then take action from that inspired and energised place.

Love Loren x

Blog Post 20: I should be grateful and not want more…

My client, an amazing senior manager at a large company, looked at me ashamedly and said “I have a great life. A lovely spouse, amazing kids, a job that pays well, a career that I’ve worked hard to get, but I am just not happy. Something isn’t right.”

I looked at her and asked, “if you did know what was wrong, what would you say?”

I had a hunch.

You see, many of the clients I work with struggle with similar things. I’ve noticed patterns. 

Patterns of the type of Mums that come see me, and patterns in their thoughts and feelings that become the reason why they need a coach to help them through this phase in their lives.

My clients are amazing, high-achieving career oriented women. Then they have kids. And then they realise that their career either doesn’t fulfil them or isn’t sustainable whilst being a present Mum to their kids.

Interestingly, it is often the former - the fulfilment piece, that is the main problem.

So many people in the world think that all Mums want when they return to work is flexibility.

Sure, flexibility is important, but what’s more important to the Mums I see is fulfilment.

They want to feel fulfilled in their work and career. They want to do work that ‘helps others’, that they believe is meaningfully contributing to better our world.

This is a beautiful thing.

But often, my client’s criticise themselves for ‘wanting more’. They first tell me why they are feeling so unhappy and unsatisfied, and then they talk themselves out of it by saying “I have flexibility in my role though. I’m paid pretty well. And I worked so hard for this career.”

Here’s the thing - you can be content with your life AND still be hungry for more. 

These two things are completely aligned, especially for high-achieving career oriented Mums.

Our drive and ambition doesn’t just ‘switch off’ after having kids.

In my opinion, our drive and ambition actually increase, because it forces us to reevaluate our career and its impact through the lens of being a parent, who has just brought a child into this world. 

Suddenly, it’s not about ‘just me’ anymore. It’s about making this world a better place.

Doing something that our children would be proud of us for doing.

Doing something that we would be proud to tell our kids we are doing.

So I’m here to tell you this - you can be proud of yourself for what you’ve accomplished AND KNOW that you’re meant for so much more.

The next step after you accept this paradox is to take stock of what you’ve accomplished, what you’ve loved doing, what’s important to you, and then go out there and discover what’s possible for you.

And how do you know what's possible for you? 

YOU get to decide.

I help my clients tap into what’s possible for themselves, and then go out there and create it in the world.

So, for all my high-achieving amazing Mamas out there, repeat after me: 

“I can be content with my life AND still hungry for more”

“I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished AND I’m meant for so much more”

If you’re ready to discover what really is possible for you, book in a free Consult Call and let’s discover it already! There is no time like the present 🙂

Love Loren x

Blog Post 19: 2 simple strategies to make sure you WIN every single day 🙌

My husband and I had just put the kids to sleep. 

It was 7:30pm and I had hit a wall. I was SO exhausted.

I opened my to-do list and noticed that it had actually become LONGER, not shorter. 🤦🏻‍♀️

I felt like I had failed at the day. I thought I did so much though?

I looked at my calendar for the next day and saw several client sessions and meetings. I saw barely any white space. Not much time to do all the other things on my to-do list.

I felt overwhelmed. I knew the next day would be just as busy, if not busier than today, and my to-do list would likely get bigger once again.

The never ending to-do list of life as a Mum…

Does this sound familiar to you?

So many of us Mums feel this way. Our to-do lists seem to be ever-expanding, and often at the end of a day we are so exhausted, but then notice our to-do lists not getting any smaller.

Many of my clients really struggle with this and they think they are unproductive, drowning in all the ‘things’ they have to get done (and seemingly not getting done). They tell me that they feel like they are failing as a Mum. They are failing as a worker, employee, business owner. That they are kind of ‘failing at life’.

I used to be one of those Mums but then I learnt and implemented a few game-changing strategies that I now use daily, that have turned every single day into a win. Into a success. Into a productive day.

I wanted to share two of those strategies in this blog post.

1. 3 Daily Done Wins

This strategy is deceptively simple, but so effective.

At the end of each day, all you need to do is write down 3 wins that you had during the day. Three things that you accomplished in the day. These can be big wins or small wins. They are wins nonetheless. 

Dan Sullivan, one of the elite coaches for entrepreneurs says that “the past is your property.” 

The most amazing thing about our past is that, if you think about it, it really only exists as a memory in your mind.

The event or situation happened, and it’s what you are making it mean now that is determining how you feel about that past event or situation. And it’s entirely within your control to determine what you’ll make that past experience mean. 

So why, at the end of the day, do we look back on our day and think of all the things we haven’t done, rather than all the things we have done?

Allowing myself to reframe my day by looking at what I have done vs what I haven’t done has completely shifted my mindset. At first I admit it was difficult to do. My brain tried to revert back to its default negativity bias, looking at what hadn’t been done. 

But instead of beating myself up for doing that, I gave myself compassion. My brain has done that for 35 years, of course it’s going to try to go down that path, it’s so used to it. It unconsciously thinks about it. And those things I ‘haven’t done’ are also still on the to-do list, so I don’t need to really give them another worrying thought. All I need to do now is practice reframing the day that’s just been  by consciously and deliberately thinking about three wins - three things I did do and accomplish.

Even if you consider the wins to be ‘small’, remember that every incremental step takes you one step further. All big things come from small beginnings. Small steps lead to extraordinary outcomes.

Acknowledging your wins, no matter how small you perceive them to be, gives you momentum and motivation to move forward.

To make this exercise even more effective, I encourage you to write them down. Just create a GoogleDoc or a new Notes document in your phone, write the date, and bullet point 3 wins that you had each day. It’s amazing how good you feel after doing this one simple thing.

2. 3 Daily To-Do Wins

My next strategy is for you to think about 3 wins you’ll have the next day, ahead of time.

Not only will this help you become more organised, it will also help you focus on what you most want to achieve.

And write down no more than 3 wins.

Have you ever looked at your to-do list, seen that it had at least 8 big tasks on it, knowing it would be physically impossible to get them all done in a day, so you just end up feeling overwhelmed and not doing any?

Doing this sets yourself up for failure. You’re overcommitting your future self. You know that you won’t be able to get everything done. You’re not going to miraculously get 5 more hours in the day, so why set yourself up to only beat yourself up for not achieving everything on your to-do list at the end of the day?

There’s a quote I love that says “if you have more than 3 priorities, nothing is a priority.”

I’ve done a lot of research and coaching on personal development and productivity, and most psychologists and successful entrepreneurs agree that you should only put 3 things on your to-do list each day.

This was a VERY hard pill for me to swallow, but as I started following this advice, I noticed my productivity, effectiveness and success in my business exponentially increased. 

It also massively increased my confidence and helped me lean into a growth mindset.

I hope these two simple strategies help you become aware of how much you ARE actually doing in a day, and help you plan intentionally for the following day, whilst being kind to your future self and not overwhelming her.

You want your present self to have your past self AND future self’s backs. After all, all those ‘selves’ are you. 

And know that you are doing amazingly Mama! 

Love Loren x

Blog Post 18: Your career story sucks: here’s why and how to change it

The best job search strategies in the world won't work without the right mindset. 

Yes, you are the one that wants to make a change. But you are also your own biggest obstacle. 

Your mindset is what's holding you back from achieving what you want, or even from knowing what you want to achieve. 

This is GREAT news though, because it means that YOU are in control of the results you create in your career and your life. 

So how do you get into the right mindset when it comes to your career? 

There are so many strategies and techniques that you can use to cultivate a mindset that serves you when you are looking for a new job or wanting to change careers. 

One of my favourite ones that I help all my clients with, is asking them what they think about themselves and their previous work experience and training. 

What do you think about your own previous work experience? What is your career story?

I guarantee you that if you’re feeling stuck about what you want to do next in your career, or you’re feeling unsatisfied in your career but don’t know what you can do next, it’s because your thoughts about your previous work experience are holding you back from exploring the possibilities of what you can create and the career you can have.

Most of my clients come to me and they almost unknowingly and unconsciously have negative thoughts about their previous work experience.

They will say things such as “I feel like I have a really scattered work experience. I didn't really ‘fit’ in any one career. So I was switching from role to role and industry to industry.” What’s so interesting about this is that I also have other clients that are the total opposite in terms of their work experience, some that have had 10 years in the same role, in the same industry, like in the legal profession, and yet they also have negative thoughts about that.

So what you're thinking about your past experience and what you are making it mean is likely holding you back from being able to really open yourself up to exploring all of the opportunities and possibilities out there and knowing what you can create in the future.

I’ll give you an example of a pervasive thought I had when I was considering a career change and I didn't know what I wanted to do next. 

When I finished up as CEO of a non-profit, and I had already had two previous career reinventions - first as an Executive Recruiter and then another as a Lawyer, my thought about my past experience was that “I have jumped from career to career. I know a little about a lot but I am not an expert in any one thing.” 

Although this thought might seem OK on the surface, when I had that thought I felt insecure, not confident in myself or my abilities. It was generating those feelings that did not serve me when I was trying to discover what I wanted my next career move to be.

It brought up thoughts of not knowing enough, not being enough.

When I learnt how powerful and ESSENTIAL it is to have the right mindset, I realised just how much those thoughts were not serving me.

Dan Sullivan, the founder of The Strategic Coach and the author of many amazing entrepreneurial books including The Gap and The Gain, says “Your past is your property.”

YOU can make it mean whatever you want. You can create the story of your past. You can either create a story that serves you or that doesn’t. It’s your choice.

The same facts can be looked at in many different ways. If you’re looking at your past experience in a way that is negative and makes you doubt yourself and your abilities, you are hurting yourself.

If you are looking at your past experience in a way that serve you, that helps you move forward, you are 

So I could look at my previous work experience and think I jumped around and never settled. OR I can look at the exact same facts and think “Wow, I have been successful in multiple different industries in multiple different professions. I am multi-passionate, which is an amazing trait that most entrepreneurs have. It shows that I can do hard things. That I love learning and growing, and that I’m a fast learner. I’m adaptable. Maybe I don’t have 15 years of direct HR experience, but I have hired many people as a recruiter plus as a hiring manager as a lawyer and in the non-profit. I have worked in an agency, on the client side and in both corporate and the non-profit worlds. I have knowledge from all angels. I know how to help others with successful career reinventions because, not only have I helped others within my career, but I have had several of my own successful and fulfilling career reinventions.”

YOU can create your own story about your past. Why make it something that puts you down and holds you back?

Don’t make your past mean that you can’t do something. Rather, look at it and say “I did this, I learnt this, so I CAN do something else.”

I believe that nothing in your past is never a waste. 

I use the analogy of a toolbox. Your life, your work experiences, your education, your skills, your strengths are all tools that you have that you can put into your toolbox. You are building the tools in your toolbox as you go through your career, which is amazing. So why don't you look at your tools as things that serve you, that can help your next employer or help you if you're starting your own business, rather than as things that are just weighing you down.

So this week I want you to ask yourself the question, “What am I thinking about my past work experience?”

Be honest with yourself, because what you make your past mean will affect what you create in your future.

Remember, your past is your property. 

You can create whatever story you want about it.

It's yours, but I recommend that you create that story to serve you in moving forward.

Love Loren x

Blog Post 17: Two ways to help you navigate this incredibly difficult time

The events of the past week in Israel and abroad have been nothing short of devastating. 

There are no words that can appropriately describe the true evil and barbarism that we have seen.

The grief I feel for people I have never met has consumed me. I have also felt a lot of fear about my own circumstances. Where I live. Where my kids go. Just looking at my children, my precious babies, my eyes well up with tears. My mind goes to thinking about those precious babies that have been brutally murdered. It feels so close to home, because it is.

I spoke to one of my clients who was also struggling to ‘hold it together’. As we spoke she kept on saying some variation of ‘I don’t even live in Israel and I feel this. Me being scared is so stupid.”

Us Mums are so quick to beat ourselves up about pretty much anything. In this case, my client was trying to push away and invalidate her feelings of grief and fear.

When I asked her why she might be trying to do this, she said that she shouldn’t be feeling fear. That she was being selfish and self-centred by feeling fear, when others are in a much worse position, living in Israel, with family and friends that have been murdered or are in captivity.

I asked her if she thought it was appropriate for her to feel fear during this time. 

She said yes.

Us Mums often try to push away our emotions, particularly negative, difficult ones. However, it is SO important to give ourselves permission to feel these emotions fully.

It is completely appropriate to feel grief and fear during this time.

No matter what religion you are. No matter where you live.

Any human that believes in humanity would be feeling these emotions, at least to some degree.

And how we experience and process these emotions is dependent on the individual.

Grief and fear can be overwhelming and may manifest in various ways, such as sadness, anger, confusion, or even numbness. It's so important to honour and recognise our emotions without judgement.

Allow yourself to recognise what you’re feeling and validate those feelings.

A couple of things have helped me navigate this incredibly difficult time, that I wanted to share with you, in the hope that they might help you process and navigate this time as well.

First, I have stopped over consuming social media. During the first few days that the news broke, I found myself unable to look away from social media and the news. 

It might help you feel like you’re ‘in control’ and ‘doing something’ about the situation, but it does take its toll, particularly on people who feel a lot of empathy, particularly on mothers, especially given the barbarism and cold-blooded murder of children and babies.

Over Consuming social media, even when something like this is not happening in the world, overstimulates us unnecessarily and dysregulates our nervous system. 

It also exacerbates our emotional state.

If you feel the need to go on social media and watch the news, that’s fair enough. However, I now try to limit it to a few minutes 1-2 times a day, and not at night before I go to sleep.

Remember, you are in control of the content you consume, and prioritising your mental health during this time is crucial. 

Secondly, I have tried to turn my pain into purpose. 

I know it might sound obvious, but what has happened has happened. We cannot argue with reality. We also can’t rationalise what these people have done as much as we try to because these are not rational people. 

Rather, we need to turn our pain into purpose and ask ourselves “And now, what can we do? How can we help?”

I reached out to a friend in Israel and we are developing an initiative that I will share in the coming weeks. I have also found organisations to donate money to where 100% of the funds are going directly to those people that need it. 

This is an incredibly difficult time in our lives, for our people, for all people. Now is the time more than ever to show the love you have for others and also project that love back to yourself.

If you are finding it hard to cope with your day to day tasks, if you are feeling fear, know that it is okay. It is completely normal and appropriate during this time.

If you’re not as ‘productive’ as usual. If you’re not as happy and upbeat. Now might not be the time to be super productive at work. Now might not be the time to be upbeat. And that is OK. 

Give yourself some grace, space and compassion to process what is happening. 

You are doing the best you can. And the best you can IS enough. It’s more than enough.

I know none of us feel okay, but we have so much love and care for our people and our community and hopefully that can help get us through this incredibly sad and difficult time. 

Sending so much strength and love your way x

Blog Post 16: How to Know If It's The Right Time To Change Careers

Changing careers to something that is more fulfilling and lights you up can be an incredibly empowering journey, however it also can be a daunting one.

So many Mums I coach come to me after having thought about the idea of a career change for quite some time, but haven’t made the decision in their mind to actually make the change. A big part of this is because they don’t know if it’s the ‘right’ time to make the change. 

This is because we are human with a human brain. Our brain tries to maintain the status quo, stay the same, because it thinks that’ll prevent us from danger. However, it also prevents us from reaching our true potential. This is why our brain always comes up with some form of a well disguised ‘excuse’ for not making a change. And for many, it’s around the timing of making a career change.

So in this post I wanted to delve into some key signs that might indicate to you that it's the opportune moment for a career change.

I’m also going to share some actionable steps to guide you in the right direction if you are considering a career change.

Signs it's Time for a Career Change

1. Lack of Passion and Engagement

When was the last time something ‘lit you up’ at work? The last time you felt excited about what you were doing?

If you can’t remember, and you feel like you’re simply going through the motions without that zest for what you do, it’s time to reflect on what used to energise you, and what you think might energise you now.

Aligning your work with your passions and interests can reignite that lost enthusiasm. And know that passions and interests change and evolve over time as you do. For me, I used to be really interested in property law. I loved that it was something tangible and I enjoyed working on massive multi million dollar deals. But then as I evolved, when I became a Mum and had my first child, I became so aware of wanting the world to be a better place, and how could I contribute in a way that I found really meaningful. My interests then developed into serving the community and going into the not-for-profit world.

If you aren’t passionate about what you are doing, and what you do doesn’t really align with your current interests or values, it’s time to explore what work could energise you.

2. Constant Stress and Burnout

This is a big one, especially for us Mums. 

Have your workdays turned into a never-ending cycle of stress? Are you coming home at the end of the day with an empty tank, and are unable to be present or show up in the way you want to as a Mum?

Are you finding it challenging to disconnect from work even during your supposed downtime?

Are you feeling mentally and physically exhausted? (even though you might be sitting behind a desk for more hours in the day than anything else)?

For me, the biggest sign was that I wasn’t sleeping at night. I would be so incredibly tired by the end of the day but even if I fell asleep, I would wake in the middle of the night with my thoughts consumed about work - feeling the pressure to meet deadlines, expectations, and in a constant state of overwhelm. 

I remember vividly that when I would tell people I wasn’t sleeping at night, they would immediately say that it was because my kids were so young, to which I responded “they are sleeping through the night! It’s me that’s keeping myself up all night!”

3. Limited Growth and Development

Intentionally or unintentionally, many Mums end up taking a bit of ‘backseat’ in their career and professional development after they have kids. Some go back to work part-time, and although we are often getting paid less and working just as much as we did before we had kids, often employers have us taking on less projects or client-facing responsibilities, and it can sometimes feel like we are stagnating in our career.

If you have been in the same role for years with minimal change or advancement and you feel like you’re not really learning or growing professionally, it might be a sign that it’s time for a change, either changing the company you work for or potentially a career change if you believe that it’s not the company, it’s perhaps the industry or job function that is not aligning with the way in which you want to grow and develop professionally. 

Now, I don’t want you to criticise your employer, or worse, yourself, for this. But it’s good to just notice if this is the case for you. And then come from a place of curiosity and ask yourself what positions or industries might excite you and lay out a path for your growth and development?

I encourage you to keep an open mind about this. For me, when I was trying to reinvent my career and knew I wanted to start my own business, I enrolled in a program to learn more about entrepreneurship, to enhance my skills and open up new career opportunities. 

4. Mismatched Values and Culture

Another sign that it might be the right time to change careers is if the values and culture of your current workplace clash with your personal beliefs.

One of my clients, who is very into health and fitness, was working as an Operations Director at one of the largest fast food chains. Although she did enjoy parts of her work, her core values of health and fitness clashed with what the company was selling, and what she was ultimately helping to sell - fried fast food.

The company did not align with her values, so we started researching companies and industries that did. 

5. Financial Discontent

Do you feel undervalued and underpaid for the work you do? 

Do you think there’s an opportunity to earn a lot more in your current career?

One of my clients is a nurse, and she knew that her earning ‘ceiling’ was capped. So together we explored careers in sectors that would offer better compensation packages and opportunities for financial growth, that still aligned with her skills, expertise and passion to help others.

Ultimately, recognising when it's the right time to change careers is the universe nudging you toward your purpose. 

If any of the signs I mentioned in this blog resonate with you, it’s time to trust your inner wisdom and start exploring a career that lights you up and is aligned with your values.

And if you are thinking that it’s time to consider a career change but you’re unsure where to start, please know that I’m here to help you, and show you how to discover your true career calling, and help you land that dream career.

Love Loren

Blog Post 15: How to move into a new industry without starting from scratch

You’ve invested so much effort, time and money into your career so far. You are known in your industry, you have knowledge and skills from your job. 

But you’re not happy in your career.

This is one of the biggest reasons why people don’t change careers.

Because they think that all of the effort, time and money they have put into their current career will go to waste.

And that they’ll have to start ‘from the bottom.’

The truth is, you can change careers without starting from scratch.

Here are two simple strategies to do it.

1. Reframe how you think about yourself

If you know which industry or job you might want and you’re feeling like an outsider, this feeling will infiltrate the way you show up, and you’ll likely not feel good enough, impressive enough, knowledgeable enough.

Remember that you show people how you should be treated.

So in order for you to feel like more of an insider, it’s important for you to start thinking and behaving as if you already are one. As if you’re already where you want to be.

Now I don’t mean lying about your experience, but rather, ask yourself: If you were in your dream career, who would you be connecting with? What event would you be going to? What professional development workshops and classes would you attend?

Answer those questions for yourself and then take massive action and do those things.

2. Make meaningful connections with people 

So many people hate the term ‘networking’. It often conjures up an image of people wearing grey suits and being ‘fake’, drinking bad champagne and standing awkwardly in groups in a large conference room.

Instead of using the term networking, I like to say we want to make meaningful connections with people in our desired industry. We want to build powerful professional relationships.

Given 85% of jobs are filled through referrals(!) and 75% of jobs are not posted on job boards, I always tell my clients to focus their job search efforts looking for ways to make meaningful connections with people who work in their desired industries, rather than spending hours looking aimlessly at job sites.

Also, if you’re a career changer that might be lacking some direct CV experience, it’s MUCH easier to interest and inspire someone to get to know you in person, rather than blindly submitting your CV and cover letter via a job board.

The trick to doing this right is to not be thinking about just getting a job when you start making these connections. 

Rather, think of making meaningful connections so that you can learn more about your desired industry or job function and create a deeper connection with another person.

Networking is all about creating and developing meaningful relationships. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed by the thought of networking, just see it as connecting with and helping others. It’s nothing more than a conversation between two people, something you’ve done many times before.

And if that still feels overwhelming for you, sometimes I offer to my clients that they could think of networking as a research skill. You are just learning. Think of how you can prepare for a networking event or informational interview, what you want to learn and what you can share to help others.

This takes the ‘fake’ or ‘desperate’ energy out of networking. 

When you meet with these people you have identified, ask meaty questions to learn more about the industry, about their career trajectory, about their challenges and triumphs. Make it about them.

Aim to get value and give in return. Even if it’s something small, send them an article relating to something they might be interested in, attend one of their talks as a supporter. If they are snowed under with work, offer to help for free.

Doing these simple things will change the way you see yourself and how you connect with people. You will feel MUCH more confident and capable, and opportunities will come to fruition that you couldn’t have even imagined before you started.

So ask yourself: 

• What is one thing you can you do this week to become more of an insider in your desired industry?

• Who could you reach out to and create a meaningful connection with in your desired industry?

If this was helpful and would like to learn how you can building powerful professional relationships with people in your desired industry, or if you want some coaching and actionable strategies so you can reframe how you think about yourself and your career, book in your 30-minute Consultation Call and I’ll show you how.

Love Loren x

Blog Post 14: The secret to transforming your negative thoughts

Studies have shown that we think around 60,000 thoughts everyday.

90% of those thoughts are the same thoughts we had the day before.

85% of those thoughts are negative.

Why is this?

Because us humans have a negativity bias. 

This was incredibly useful back in the caveman days where any wrong move would mean certain death, but now it is not as useful.

Still, our human biology has not caught up with the technological advancements in the world and therefore, our brain still constantly reverts to thinking negative thoughts above positive ones at every opportunity.

Just understanding this simple truth has helped me immensely.

What I used to do was think a negative thought about something, and then beat myself up for thinking negative thoughts about that thing. Who else can relate?

This of course would just compound the negative thought loop.

Now though, when my brain goes down a negative thought spiral, instead of attacking myself for thinking negatively, I have compassion.

I am supposed to be thinking negative thoughts, this is what my brain was designed to do. 

Nothing has gone wrong. It’s just my human brain acting like a human brain.

The next thing that really helped me was understanding that our brains are thought-making machines. Everything we experience in the world is put through our own filter based on our beliefs, understandings, values and perspectives of our environment.

We often forget that the thoughts we have, about ourselves and the world around us, are actually not facts! 99% of our thoughts are opinions.

Even if something seems so true to us, it is likely just an opinion or perspective that we have.

That’s why people that experience the exact same thing will think very differently about that thing. For example, siblings will recount completely different stories about the exact same factual situation, because their thoughts about what happened are not facts, they are opinions based on their own filters and experience of the world.

Reflect on a negative thought you’ve had today. I bet you can.

Now, question whether that thought is really a fact? Or is it actually just an opinion you have about something, someone or yourself?

Taking the time to consciously ask myself whether a thought is a fact, or if it’s just an opinion, has honestly changed my life and the way I see the world.

I do a lot of this work with my clients. We take a look at some of their thoughts, that seem OK on the surface, but they are poisonous thoughts that my clients believe are true. When we start questioning them, poking holes in their ‘truth’, they realise that the thought is not true. It is just an opinion. And because of that, we have the power to reframe the thought to something that better serves us.

So how do we reframe our thoughts to better serve us?

To get better at anything, you need to practice.

The same applies to our mind. To think better thoughts, we need to practice thinking better thoughts.

Now, I’m not talking about toxic positivity where you go from the thought “I hate my body” to “I love my body”, because if your brain doesn’t believe that new thought then it will just further reinforce the old thought.

I’m talking about practising thoughts that you can believe, that are more neutral. 

Then you can start giving more “air time” to a thought that better serves you . 

So, taking the example above, a more neutral thought you could practise if you believed it might be “I have a body” or “I have a capable body”.

When you start practising these better thoughts it might seem like a lot of effort at first, because your mind is naturally going to try to revert back to the negative thought. Because of our negativity bias. And because it is SO used to thinking that old negative thought.

However, if you continue to practise the better thought, that new thought will eventually become your default thought.

A very powerful exercise is to write down five main thoughts that you often think about yourself or the world. Chances are those thoughts are quite negative.

Before you criticise yourself for thinking these thoughts, acknowledge that you’re thinking these thoughts because you have a human brain. You have a negativity bias which means your brain is working perfectly!

Then, question whether that thought is really true. If every single person in the world wouldn't believe that thought, then chances are it is not true. It is just an opinion.

For example, if one of your main thoughts is “I’m not good enough for a promotion”, would your Mum think that of you? Would your sibling? Would your partner? Would your friends? Would your colleagues?

If they wouldn't think that of you then it’s not the truth. It’s just an opinion that your brain is offering up. 

Acknowledging that you have a human brain with a negativity bias, that 99% of your thoughts are opinions, and then offering up thoughts that better serve you is THE way to happiness, feeling better and having an incredible life.

Love Loren x

Blog Post 13: Why a work-life balance is B.S. - and what you should aim for instead

A Work-life balance is BS.

It sets us Mums up to beat ourselves up if we believe we aren’t getting the balance just right.

When I think of ‘balance' I think of a see-saw, with one area of my life balancing on one side and another area of my life balancing on the other side. 

So for example, work on one side and kids on the other side. Or well-being and looking after myself on one side and keeping the house in order on the other side. 

When you focus on one area, the other area suffers. Like a see-saw, when one goes up, the other goes down. It’s very hard to keep them both completely balanced.

I now say I strive for a Work-Life Blend (or even a work-life integration) rather than work-life balance.

The truth is this: we cannot perfectly compartmentalise being a mother vs life vs career. Like ‘perfectionism’ it’s simply unattainable.

 These are all of our identities, blended together.

Understanding, acknowledging and having compassion that sometimes I’ll need to step away from work to tend to my child who is sick or emotional, or that I might need to send that email to someone in between feeding the kids dinner is just reality.

When we try and strive for something that is not reality, that’s when we set ourselves up to ‘fail’, to be disappointed in ourselves, to be frustrated by what-is.

What is a Work-Life Blend?

A Work-Life Blend is a more adaptable and sustainable way to navigate the demands of modern Mum life.

With a Work-Life Blend, I am a lot kinder to myself.

A Work-Life Blend entails integrating the various aspects of your life without rigidly separating them. Unlike the traditional idea of work-life balance, which often implies a strict division between work and personal time, Work-Life Blend encourages a more fluid approach. It recognises that life is dynamic and unpredictable, where professional and personal spheres are intertwined and can coexist harmoniously.

Here are 7 strategies that I have found to be very helpful in creating a Work-Life Blend in my life:

1. Allow for flexibility and adaptability 

A life well-lived is messy and unpredictable. This is completely normal!

A Work-Life Blend embraces flexibility, allowing you to adjust your schedule and priorities based on the needs of the moment. This empowers you to be present where you're needed, whether it's attending a family event or child’s recital during work hours or catching up on emails during your child's music lesson.

2. Get organised

While a Work-Life Blend is about embracing flexibility, it’s also important to be organised so that when you are ‘working’ on one area of your life, you’re able to get what you need to get done during the time allotted. So for example, going to the shops most days to pick up groceries for dinner. Seems innocent enough as it’s just 15 minutes here, 30 minutes there, but it’s also a huge time-suck. 

Instead, do a weekly online shop. Once you have a meal plan for the week, your weekly online shop can take less than 5 minutes, you can even create a weekly list and just click on 'reorder’ and then you’re not wasting time constantly going to the shops throughout the week. Instead, you can spend that time working on a project, playing with the kids or taking a well-deserved break!

3. Focus on outcomes, not hours 

It’s about quality, not quantity.

Instead of counting hours spent at work or home, a Work-Life Blend focuses on outcomes and results.

This means that, so long as you're accomplishing your tasks effectively and meeting your responsibilities, the specific hours become less relevant.

Don’t get trapped in the mindset that you have to work 8 hours a day to have a ‘good work ethic’, or that you should be the one picking up your children from school to consider yourself a ‘good Mum’.

4. Stop the Mum guilt!

The concept of work-life balance, while well-intentioned, can sometimes be counterproductive. 

Striving to compartmentalise work and personal life often leads to unnecessary stress. Achieving a ‘perfect’ equilibrium between the two is incredibly challenging in today's interconnected world, so why set yourself up with that expectation?

Trying to pursue this results in compounded ‘Mum guilt’, when work inevitably spills into family time or vice versa, making it difficult to truly relax or be fully engaged in either sphere.

By recognising that life is a blend of various roles and responsibilities, it can help reduce the Mum guilt that arises from trying (and failing) to maintain a strict balance. 

This will in turn allow you to relax a little, lean into the blend and the reality of life rather than try to resist.

I’ve found that by doing this, my ‘lighter’ energy rubs off on my children, as I let go of the stresses of trying to ‘control’ something that’s beyond my control and embrace what-is in reality.

5. Get creative

If you believe that dropping off your children at school in the mornings is important to you, but you have work, it’s time to get creative.

Ask your boss if you’re able to drop your kids off at school a few times a week, get into the office an hour later and then either work through lunch or stay a bit longer at the end of the day. 

Or, if you’re working part-time, offer to work an hour or so on the day that you usually don’t work to make up for it. 

Or, because you’re an amazing employee (which I’m sure you are already), just ask your boss if they mind you coming into the office an hour later a couple of times a week so you can drop your children at school without saying anything about “making up the time” (refer to my 3rd strategy above!)

These ideas may not work for everyone, but thinking that you want something and immediately shutting it down, assuming it’s “not possible”, without even exploring it, will only make you feel upset and resentful.

6. Just ask!

Another thing that I’ve found very helpful in cultivating a Work-Life Blend is ‘getting over myself’ and just asking for help, not only when I ‘need’ it, but also when I know it will allow me to significantly help elevate one area of my life.

For example, I broke my foot a few weeks ago. We usually have a nanny a couple days a week, and so I asked my husband if he was happy for me to ask the nanny to work a few extra hours on those days.

Yes, I could certainly get the kids breakfasts ready and make their dinners, even with a broken foot, but I knew it would take about 10 times the amount of time than usual (using crutches and in a moon boot) and it would consume a lot of my physical and mental energy.

I could instead use that time to do some extra work for my business, because I’m just as productive working with a broken foot than without (I thankfully work from home on a laptop).

I know I’m fortunate that we can get a few extra hours with the nanny over the next few weeks, but if you don’t have that, you could ask your parents or in-laws, or even a friend to help out where possible.

Rather than shutting down the possibility of asking for extra help, like the previous strategy, try and get creative. 

Ask these questions to yourself:

• How could I make this work?

• Who might be able to help? 

• Who might I be able to help sometime and then they can help me out another time?

  7. Prioritise self-care

I know, “shut up Loren”. Everyone says this but it’s not realistic.

Except it isn’t. 

I schedule self-care in my calendar before any other commitments during the week.

My rationale is this: If I’m not running, the household isn’t running.

(I’m not literally ‘running’), but I mean that if I’m not functioning, the household is definitely not functioning.

They say you’re only as happy as your unhappiest child.

Well, the household is only as happy and healthy as Mum.

PLEASE schedule in time for your own hobbies, exercise and relaxation to recharge your energy. Even if it’s 10 minutes a day.

Start small.

Ultimately, I believe that the concept of a Work-Life Blend offers a more holistic and adaptable approach to navigating the busy-ness and complexities of modern Mum life.

Embracing a Work-Life blend will help you to create a more harmonious existence where work and personal life coexist in a way that enhances your productivity, well-being, happiness and overall life satisfaction. 

So, instead of striving for a rigid work-life balance, consider embracing the fluidity of Work-Life Blend and finding your own unique way to integrate the different facets of your life.

I’ll leave you with this question to ask yourself: What’s the first thing you can do towards creating more of a Work-Life Blend starting from today?

Let me know!

Love Loren x

Blog post 12: Underthinking: The Most Underrated Skill

I’ve been thinking about overthinking lately. The irony is not lost on me.

If you’re anything like me, you overthink things. 

Perhaps you overthink everything.

You sweat the small stuff and the big stuff. 

The small stuff such as what you’ll make for dinner or which brand of cereal to buy for the kids. And big stuff such as your career or buying a car.

Overthinking is defined as thinking about something too much or for too long.

Thinking is great, don’t get me wrong. It’s overthinking that ironically gets us stuck.

Overthinking is analysing a situation, thinking about something over and over again. 

Usually we overthink when we are thinking something negative - either that has happened or we are worried will happen.

If you’re thinking about something that’s already happened, you analyse the situation, the people involved, what they are thinking. You ruminate in your head about everything that happened, that shou’dve happened, that you wish happened. 

Sometimes we overthink about what might happen in the future.  We create all these stories and fantasies of all the bad things that could happen. 

Our mind is overthinking and orchestrating something that hasn’t even happened yet (and likely won’t happen in the way you’re overthinking about it). Nothing has gone wrong! Yet our mind is racing. 

Overthinking is so mentally draining and time consuming. 

Your amazing mind can be put to MUCH better use. 

I’ve realised that I overthink when I am feeling self-doubt - either about how I handled or will handle a situation, or about my abilities. 

Overthinking for me is also intrinsically linked to perfectionism. 

Just noticing and becoming aware of this connection has been very powerful for me.

Overthinking doesn’t serve me. 

Thinking is great, but when it starts getting into ruminating, worrying and delaying decision making, then it becomes overthinking. 

Boy have I done A LOT of overthinking in my life! 

My neural pathways are very good at overthinking. 

I realised that I needed to develop the skill of underthinking to strengthen that neural pathway.

The results I’ve had from developing the skill of underthinking has been a game changer.

Here are 4 strategies I have used that have helped me develop the skill of underthinking:

1. Accept I cannot change the past

Byron Katie says that “when you argue with reality you lose, but only 100% of the time”.

We can’t change the past. What has happened has happened.

I can only change how I think about the past. 

What I make it mean for me now, in this moment.

Going back into the past and overanalysing and overthinking about it is pointless. I can’t change any of it!

I can’t change what has already happened. 

I think about what I can learn about the past situation and move forward.

2. Tap into your intuition

Underthinking isn't about ignoring important decisions or acting recklessly. It's about tapping into your intuition, that gut feeling that often holds profound insights. 

One question I love to ask my brain when I am overthinking is “if I already knew the answer, what would it be?”

Intuition is your mind's way of processing information and experiences quickly, distilling them into a simple, instinctual response. By allowing yourself to underthink, you're actually giving your intuition a chance to guide you.

3. Make decisions efficiently and effectively 

Overthinking leads to decision paralysis. 

A decision is made in a moment. Overthinking about a decision is what takes time. It is also incredibly draining on your energy. 

Gather the information you need and then make the decision AND have your own back that you made the best decision with the information you had in that moment.

4. Balance rationality with intuition

Underthinking doesn't mean ignoring rational thought. It's about finding a balance between rationality and intuition. It's recognising that often, the simplest solution is the best one. 

There's a certain wisdom in simplicity that shouldn't be underestimated. Underthinking, when approached mindfully, can be a great skill that brings clarity, efficiency and a lightness in life.

Underthinking has also helped me be more creative in solving problems.

One question I love to ask myself when I’m doing something new or when I’m aware that I’m overthinking is this: “how can I make this fun and easy?”

Developing the skill of underthinking has surprisingly helped reduce my stress and anxiety as it stops me from dwelling on every possible outcome and hypothetical scenario. This has significantly lightened my mental load and I feel a much greater sense of peace and contentment with myself and my life.

So, the next time you find your mind is racing in endless analysis and overthinking, use one of these strategies to develop the skill of underthinking.

Your mind might just thank you for giving it a break from the constant running and for the clarity and peace it brings!

Love Loren x

Blog Post 11: 10 Simple Strategies To Achieve Your Goals This Year

This is what usually happens: We try to create a goal to achieve in our life, whether it be personal or professional.

We say it aloud or write it down on a piece of paper, and then realise we don't know exactly how we are going to achieve that goal, so we push it to one side and just ignore it.

But it often taps us on the shoulder and whispers in our ear “I'm still here. I know you want this. Why aren't you doing it?”

Your goals are your desires. When they form in your mind, I like to think of it as your future self showing you the beacon of where you need to get to next.

Most goals we create are so much more than just a goal to us. They are showing us what we truly want in our lives. 

The more persistent it is, nudging you as you go about your day, the more likely it is to be something that, if you achieve, will take you to that next version of yourself. 

Most people just push their true desires, their goals away and try to ignore them, using excuses like “it’s just too hard”, or “I’ll start when things aren’t so busy”.

More often than not a person doesn’t start on their goal because they don’t know the ‘exact’ steps that they need to take to achieve the goal. 

They don’t know the ‘how’, so they give up before they really try to achieve it.

This is failing ahead of time.

In this blog, I’ll explore 10 strategies to help you take action on your goals even when you don't know all the steps to get there.

1. Define your goal clearly

While you might not know every detail about how to achieve your goal, having a clear understanding of what you want to accomplish is important. Break down your goal into specific and measurable components. I like creating a SMARTY goal.  This stands for:

• Specific: What exactly do you want to accomplish? 

• Measurable: How will you know when your goal is achieved? How will you measure success?

• Achievable/Attainable: Your goal should be challenging but attainable.

• Realistic: Make sure your goal can genuinely be accomplished.

• Time-bound: By when will you have achieved this goal? 

Most people stop here with the SMART goal formula, however I believe it is really important to have a compelling Why (Y), and keep this in mind when you are setting and working towards your goal.

• Why (Y): Why do you want to achieve this goal? How will your life be positively impacted by achieving this goal? 

Being able to tie your goals to a greater “Why” will help increase your chances of success, and keep you motivated as you are moving towards that goal. This clarity will serve as a guiding light, helping you focus your efforts even when the path ahead is uncertain.

2. Research and gather information

Research and gather information on the goal, and some strategies you can use to get there. 

However, this strategy comes with a warning.

Do not do things for too long.

This strategy might feel like you are doing something, but it is only beneficial up to a certain point.

Researching and consuming information is taking Passive Action on your goal.

You want to be taking Massive Action towards your goal.

Here’s what it looks like in practice. For example, I want to create a website for my business:

• Passive Action = researching the best website platform provider, comparing providers, watching videos, attending workshops, reading on forums.

This might seem like I am working towards my goal, but in truth I haven’t actually even started creating the website, which is the goal.

• Massive Action = deciding on the website platform provider, paying the fee, creating my first Home page, publishing the website, letting my network know my website is live

3. Write down your goal and tell at least one person about it

Once you define your goal, write it down and tell at least one person about it.

When you do this, it is officially out there, in the world. You can no longer ignore it. It is no longer a thought or a wish in your head. 

I find this helps keep me accountable, and helps me live into and lean into my goal. 

It is happening. I am on the path. 

It goes from “I have a dream to ___” to “I’m working on ___ goal.”

4. Create a ‘flexible’ list

Once you have done some initial research, it’s time to use your super thinking power.

Write down all of the things that you think you need to do to achieve your goal.

Remember, this list is flexible and WILL change, so don’t overthink it.

Because chances are when you’re actioning them ‘in the real world’, they will not turn out the way you had anticipated.

5. Break down your list into manageable steps

If your list feels overwhelming, break down each line item to tasks that are more manageable.

For example, if I have on my list “make a website”, this might feel overwhelming, so I break it down into smaller steps.

Find website host platform, learn how to use platform, create wording/copy for my home page, add the wording to the home page, find images to add to the homepage, upload images to that home page etc.

6. Start with the first step

Once you make your flexible list, so many people get hung up on ‘where’ to start.

The truth is, it doesn’t really matter where you start. It just matters that you start!

Review your list and think about which one might be the best one to start with, with the information you currently have.

Just focus on that first step, and then the next, and then the next.

Remember this: Action Creates Clarity.

Starting small also helps build momentum and confidence, gradually propelling you towards your larger goal.

7. Embrace the learning curve 

Not knowing the ‘how’ is completely normal. 

If you don’t know the ‘how’, nothing has gone wrong! 

You are on the right track.

You are not supposed to know the ‘how’.

The truth is, if you haven’t achieved that goal yet you won’t ever know the ‘how’. 

You’ll only know the ‘how’ once you get there.

So instead of letting the unknown discourage you, see it as part of the course. See it as an opportunity to learn and grow. 

Adopt a growth mindset, which is believing that your abilities and intelligence can be developed through effort and learning. This mindset allows you to see your journey towards the goal as  being an opportunity to learn and grow.

Obstacles = Opportunities

Each step you take, even your perceived ‘failures’, brings you closer to your goal, and imparts valuable insights.

Remember, failing is giving up on your goal. Everything else is just gathering information.

8. Seek guidance and mentorship

Connect with people who have experience in your field or have achieved similar goals. Their insights and advice can provide valuable shortcuts, helping you avoid common pitfalls and navigate challenges more effectively.

However, like with the research and gathering information strategy, do not stay on this step for too long, or take a person’s word as gospel. There are many ways to achieve a goal, and what worked for one person may not work for another.

9. Think like your future self - the person that has achieved the goal already

Ask yourself, what would you be thinking if you had already achieved the goal?

What would you be doing?

How would you be feeling?

What would you be thinking?

How would you be showing up in the world?

If you can become the person you are striving to be, and work towards your goal from that mindset, you will achieve it.

You could even try asking yourself this powerful question: Think about your future self as having already achieved the goal and get him/her to tell your present self how you did it.

Or think about a person you admire, and imagine that they have achieved that goal. Try and imagine what they would say about how they achieved that goal and the steps that they took to achieve it.

Your own creativity in answering this question will astound you.

10. Remember that Imperfection is Perfection

Do not strive for perfection as you work on your goal.

Taking Massive Action, even if it’s not ‘perfect’ (according to whose standards anyway?), is much better than waiting for the perfect moment or plan.  

Why? Because there is NO such thing as perfection.

Success is built upon a pile of failures.

Ultimately, we will never truly know the ‘how’ until we get there. Until we achieve the goal.

If you use these strategies, you can navigate the unknown and uncertainty with confidence.

Success happens when you’re willing to learn, adapt and take Massive Action even when the path isn’t clear.

What you might find is this: Achieving the goal never ends up being about the goal itself. The actual achievement of the goal is just a moment in time. 

The ‘goal’ of a goal is to show you what you are capable of. 

It is about the person you become on the way to achieving the goal. 

It really is the journey rather than the destination.

Love Loren x